Wednesday, January 30, 2008
I think I am mad le...
Acting very crazy nowadays....
Doing crazy things too...
Very.... very... very....
Don't know is good or bad...
Maybe just trying to run away from something...
lol....
But who care right....
__________________________
Fuck U for appearing in my dream...
Fuck U for everything you do in my dream....
Fuck U!!__________________________
Sunday, January 27, 2008
正羽已死....
Bern is Dead....
What is left is only a body without a soul....
Feel like closing down my blog...
MSN....
Facebook...
Friendster...
etc...
Shut myself down to this world...
Should I???
Can I???
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Went to sch today for nothing...
No apel 2 class...
Reach sch at 8.42...
Leave at 10....
2+ hour of waiting....
But it was ok....
At least I was alone...
Friday, January 25, 2008
Lost...
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Thursday, January 24, 2008
Not being online this few days...
Having time on my own...
Make me feel free again...
But I know that is all a lie...
I am still the same old me...
No.... I have lost myself somewhere...
ha... so funny.. who will lost themselves right....
But I did...
Don't what I doing now...
Don't what I thinking now...
Who I am now...
Feeling empty... very... very... very....
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Today is the last day for LS...
After class went to hereafter alone...
To export the footage out...
My group later met SC...
After the meeting...
Didn't know where to go...
Home?
Don't feel like it...
Went to the bus stop... Sat down...
518 came.... Took the bus...
And went town alone....
From there I started walking..walking...walking...
Heeren.... PS..... Bugis.... Cityhall..... Marina spuare.... Suntec....
I walked from 2.30 to 8....
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Found this cafe when I was walking around bugis...
I walked in for a cup of coffee...
Kind of nice...
Cheap too...
Is a nice place to chill...
But it will be nicer if it is bigger...
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Won't be online for the next few days...
From today to Fri...
Or maybe longer...
Anything important...
Like meeting etc...
Call or sms me...
Anot just leave me alone...
Monday, January 21, 2008
MY MOOD SUCK TODAY!!!!
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Went to watch Cloverfield today...
Kind of cool...
The whole movie is shoot on handycam...
Nearly puke...
Not my kind of shooting style...
But is kind of nice...
At least something different....
Although the ending is like what the hell...
Friday, January 18, 2008
Don't know what to write today...
Feeling very down...
I think I am breaking down...
Help me...
I can't breathe...
Monday, January 14, 2008
Off the light....
So I can't see...
Off the light...
So I can't hear...
Off the light...
So I won't think....
Off the light...
So I can be in the darkness...
And leave me alone....
Sunday, January 13, 2008
What is the fastest way to forget someone....
Can't take it any more...
My heart really hurts....
Feel like crying.....
But my tear are not coming out of my eyes...
I think I am really in love with you...
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Openhouse this few day...
Kind of cool...
There will Ups and Downs...
Today went crazy...
Went around giving out T- shirts...
And talk to strangers... lol...
Was so high when I was with my friend...
But still kind of emo...
Haiz... hopefully it will end soon...
But I guess it won't...
Cause life is not easy for me nowadays...
Thursday, January 10, 2008
I hate myself....
Really hate myself....
Told myself that I need to give up....
But I can't...
I think I went in too deep I think....
Deeper then what I think it is....
Deeper...............................................................................................
But what can I do...
I know......
I must let it go....
Or I won't be the same me anymore....
Monday, January 07, 2008
Did my DISC yesterday...
Its a Personality style report...
And guess what I got...
The report said that I am a Advisor...
It is kind of true...
It said that I look at relationships as a important thing in my life...
And I agree with that...
I like to listen to people problem and give them some advise...
But...
Why when it come to me...
I can't do it...
Can't make up my mind...
Keep thinking about silly things...
Why just I can't stop myself from all that....
I know what is good for me...
But I just can't stop myself...
Can I find my way back soon....
Or...
It will go on and on...
I really dont know...
Went swimming alone yesterday...
There was many people...
Wanted to go home when I saw the crowd....
But when I jumped into the pool..
I felt better...
It was quiet...
It like the time just stopped....
Everything in my mind just stopped like that when I swim...
But when I get out off the pool...
Things are back to normal...
Didn't want to wake up today...
Trying hard to not open my eye...
But I have too...
When time goes by...
Feeling worst...
Sorry Wx that if I sound kind of piss on msn...
Didn't mean it...
I am Sorry.....
Plz forgive me...
Thank everyone for trying to make me feel better...
Love you guys...
Sunday, January 06, 2008
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What if this happen?....
Will I die?
What if I really died?....
Will anyone of you cry for me?
What if....
Did this...
Because I was bored at home...lol...
Something that I will never do in my life.....
But if I really died...
It will be the end of everything for me ...
But for my friend and family it new beginning without me around....
Maybe they will be sad in the beginning...
But after many years... people will still go on with their daily life...
Forgetting who I am...
ha.. But what to do... life is like that ....
I need to thank the people that encourage me...
I am very happy that you care...
Thank!!
Believe me I will be fine...
But it takes time...
Saturday, January 05, 2008
For those who are reading this plz dont worry about me... I just need time to plan thing out...I am lost....
Really lost now....
Don't know what to do...
Getting sick and tired of of what am I doing...
Am I meant for what I am doing now...
Looking at the other people's production...
Make me feel that I am not there yet....
Looking at wx and novem passion for video...
I try to burn the passion in me again...
But it don't seem working....
I try to write my own story out....
But it seem like another movie I watch before....
Can't come out with a good story...
I ask myself...
Did I take this course because I have no choose or I like it?...
Can't really see myself working as a production crew...
Can I stop going school?
Go for a holidays or something...
Just get out of Singapore...
Go to find who I really am...
And is video meant for me...
But I can't..
Sometime I will ask myself what is the point of holding on...
Just cut my wrist...
And everything will end there...
But no worries...
I won't do that...
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
It's a new year...
But it's still the same old me...
Still the same old feeling I have in the past few weeks...
Trying to stop emoing....
Put a smile on my face....
Be as high as me can when I am around people....
Act normal....
But ones I am alone...
Things start appearing in my mind...
Things that I don't want to think about...
haiz...
Why can't just everything stop...
Stop school...
Stop time...
Stop everything...
Really.....
Don't feel like doing anything at this time...
But I can't...
Hopefully when the times goes by I can be myself again....
Forget about everything that I am emoing...
Wish me luck....
Went to watch Cloverfield today...
Off the light.....jpg)
What if this happen?....